Culture Watch

Last Sunday, I held a Zoom conversation with people who wanted to discuss some of the political climate we are in, especially as it has affected relationships with friends and family. We didn’t record it, so nothing to share there, but we had a great time talking about putting our hope in God’s kingdom, not the political parties that humans have devised. We had a lot of people share the trajectory of their journey from a strong partisan point of view, to a greater generosity toward people who don’t see the world the way they do.

One of the issues that kept arising in that conversation was about racial equity, and how to be a voice for positive change in an environment that is so politically charged.  One wrote me this after:  “I’d love another one on how and what we can do to be more racially conscious and helpful. When I speak up and I do, I’m making groups feel self-conscious and I’m a little ostracized…🤨”

So I asked Arnita, one of my co-authors on A Language of Healing, to lend her insight as an African-American woman as to how people from the majority culture can be more sensitive and helpful as allies in the quest for racial justice. This Sunday, February 14 at 10:30 am Pacific Time, I’m going to host another Zoom conversation with Arnita to help people explore how to have better conversations here.

This time, however, I’m going to limit the room to about 25 people so we can have more of an interactive conversation. However, I will also be streaming it live on The God Journey Facebook page  for those who would like to watch it. It will also be on that page for people to listen to afterwards, and we may even excerpt some of that conversation for a future podcast at The God Journey.

If you’d like to be part of that conversation let me know and I’m going to prayerfully select twenty-five people out of those who want to join us. This is not limited to the majority culture and I hope to have a good representation of people with brown and black skin with us as well.

Whether you want to join us in the room or not, if you have any specific questions you’d like Arnita and me to address, please send them in advance so we can give them our consideration.

I am giving first opportunity to those of you who were there last week but will also be inviting others as well.  I know everyone can’t be in the room with us but we are going to stream it live, record it, and possibly put excerpts in a future podcast of The God Journey.

I got this email last week, and it really touched me. I know this woman isn’t alone. Many have come through this pandemic and election season confused about what is true and how to deal with people in our lives who seem to have fallen prey to many of the lies that are disarming the power of his church.

My heart hurt for this lady and what she is going through, but I also admire the courage of her honesty and how to handle what’s going on around her:

Today, I got an email from someone I looked up to circulating a conspiracy theory about vaccines, and it kind of just cracked me open. I’m seeing the people who taught me to value truth abandon it or not even using the slightest bit of discernment as they circulate clearly problematic “information.”

I just don’t know what to do. It’s hurting me more than I expected. The isolation of this year is hard, homeschooling our three boys is hard, the political turn the country has taken has been deeply concerning. Watching what’s happening in the church is by far the hardest.

This year the church looks nothing like the church to me. I watched my Mom and her husband make fun of the black lives matter movement. I listened to my sister’s pastor preach against black lives matter for having points he disagreed with. I watched people I went to Bible school with mock George Floyd’s death and condemn the protests that followed. My entire family, right down to cousins, seem to have bought into the “rigged election” lies. With that comes political conspiracy theories using the name of Jesus. Now the vaccine conspiracy theories. Most of my family is wrapped up in this. I feel so sad and so tired. I feel brittle. Every day Jesus teaches me more how much He loves me, I’m completely 100% all in with Jesus, but for the first time in my entire life, I’m not so sure what to do with Christians. I don’t know who they are anymore. It makes me cry.

What I thought was, isn’t. The people I respected, I now do not. The people I trusted, I now do not. I don’t want to be part of a church that is a thinly veiled political party with spiritual window dressing. But I do want Jesus and all the He has for me, wherever that might be.

I’ve had quite an exchange with her and even interact a bit with this email on The God Journey podcast set to air tomorrow (February 5).  I wrote the blog on The Symptoms of Delusion to engage in this kind of conversation. If you are having some of the same struggles this lady is and would like to get together with some other people to talk about it, I’m going to hold an open Zoom conversation this Sunday, February 7 at 10:30 am Pacific Time.  Please understand me. This is not for people who take offense to her email and want to argue that the election was rigged, that Donald Trump is a modern-day Cyrus, that there isn’t racial injustice in this country, or that the vaccine is unsafe.  This is for those who want to have a different conversation — how do I navigate a Christian world I feel so out of step with? And, what might God be doing in our day through all of this that can give me hope?

And, if that doesn’t include you, please don’t feel judged or excluded from God’s life or my love.  This is a very trying time and rather than fight over the controversy on Sunday, we just want to talk to those who are feeling alienated from their friends and family who see politics very differently than they do.

If you’d like to join us, please email me and I will send you a Zoom link.  We’ll spend about an hour together and see what God does.

Also ——————-

I’m looking for ten or so people who are between 25 and 40 years of age with a sense that God has given you specific gifts to help equip others to live in his love in a bit more unconventional way than some of our religious boxes provide.  I already have a few in mind, but I sense there are some others who would like to get together weekly on Zoom and see where the conversation goes. This is not so I can teach you anything. I have no agenda or curriculum for you to follow, but just a willingness to walk alongside a few younger people while God is shaping something in their hearts.  This will be a chance for us to bounce questions and insights off each other and see what God does. I only want people who are already familiar with the passions of my heart from having read at least a few of my books or listened to a fair amount of podcasts.  I hope to encourage people who feel as if God is inviting them on a similar walk.

If you’d like to be considered, please email me. If I don’t know you already tell me a bit about yourself and why you would be interested in this kind of gathering.  I’m looking to start with about ten or twelve people so I’m going to be praying about who that might be off of the things you share with me.  If there’s more interest then I’ll have to see about starting another or what else God might have in mind.

2020 was a disaster on so many levels, the greatest of which was a worldwide pandemic that we couldn’t even take on as a common enemy with a united front. Instead, we politicized it with everyone did what was right in their own eyes without regard for a greater common good.

So, half our population thinks the pandemic is overblown and carelessly spreads it to others by refusing to obey the CDC guidelines for limiting travel, masking, maintaining social distance, and avoiding indoor gatherings through this holiday season. I know the odds are in your favor that you probably won’t get it, and even if you do, you will recover quickly. Too often, however, the odds catch up with people who live carelessly, either for them or someone they love. The virus offered us the opportunity to lay down our lives for others, and so far, we seem to be failing that test.

And support measures by some governors who overreached their authority by unnecessarily closing all businesses of a certain type and not letting business owners find ways to continue their business with proper safety measures. If we’d all been able to respect social distancing recommendations, I wonder how many more businesses could have stayed open, but people wanted to party, gather in large groups, and hang out indoors. How can you trust a government that lies to us for three months that masks won’t protect you when they knew it wasn’t true?  And why does the federal government keep sending stimulus money even to those who have kept their jobs and maintained their incomes instead of targeting those who actually lost their income? It’s chaos out there, but you can still live in the genuine peace that makes no circumstantial sense.

Now, as we enter 2021, what does the world need most from you?

More than ever, our world needs an army of people who will live generously in a world dominated by the selfish and the arrogant. I know it’s hard when everyone else looks out for their own self-interest, and you feel you’ll get overrun by them. A couple of weeks ago, I talked with a friend about living free of the pain of our own self-centered thinking on a podcast. That conversation continues to flow into places in my heart that is setting me freer in his love. You can only afford to learn selflessness when you are confident Father’s love has got your back.

And by living generously, here’s some of what I think of…

• Asking God to show you ways to care about the marginalized people around you. Spend a bit of each day putting yourself in their shoes and asking how you would want someone to respond to you.
• Passing your stimulus check on to those in need if you have maintained your income through this pandemic. If you don’t know anyone, give it to a group providing food for those who don’t have it.
• Sharing whatever you have with those around you—extra resources, a virtual shoulder to cry on if they need comfort, an unexpected phone call just to check on them, etc.
• Putting on a mask when you’re around others, even if you think it isn’t necessary, just because it sets them at ease.
• Not taking offense even to the selfish and toxic people around you who want to start an argument.  Just move to a safe distance and love them as best you can from there.
• Taking the vaccine when it is offered to you, even if you’re afraid it may have side effects. Jesus took the cross for you, knowing the side-effects were torture and certain death. The vaccine is the only way to get to herd immunity without millions of others needlessly dying. (And please don’t send me your anti-vaccine conspiracy theories. I don’t buy the fact that thousands of medical professionals, the same ones I went to for heart surgery and others I know used for cancer, would be involved in a deception like this to wreak mayhem on the populace for no apparent reason.)
• When you do something risky, like flying or getting caught in a large crowd, quarantine yourself for 14 days, especially from elderly and high-risk people.
• Learning the joy of not taking offense even when people mistreat you. Keep loving as best you can.
• Don’t try to fix people around you; it will only push them deeper into their delusion or brokenness.

You may have different ideas. Just remember living generously is not primarily following a checklist; it’s a different way of navigating the world. Every day ask yourself what generosity would lead you to do. Learn the joy of an others-focused life, and even if the world kills you for it, you will have lived a life worth living.

The best thing about living generously is that no one can make you do it. Our default setting seems to be doing whatever we think is best for us. Expanding our perspective to do what’s best for others around us is a major shift of thought. If you don’t choose it you’ll never discover its joy.

May you all have a really blessed New Year, but looking for ways to bless others with the gift of grace Father has given you,

_____________

Live Loved Free Full

The e-book is out on Kindle, but release of my new devotional book has been delayed until mid-January due to some issues with the virus at the printing plant.  But starting on Friday, January 1, I’ll be posting the first devotionals online so you can read them if you want to start at the beginning. However, this book is not written in that kind of order, so you can start whenever you want throughout the year. If you haven’t pre-ordered your copy yet, you can do so here.

Don’t Miss This

Our last two podcasts of 2020 were two of the best of the year, focusing on how to become increasingly one with love. That conversation is still re-writing wonderful things in my own heart and changing how I live in the world. If these are the only podcasts you listen to this year at The God Journey, you will find them well worth your time.

A Head’s Up

Early this year, Wayne will release a new limited series podcast called My Friend Luis. In 10 immersive episodes, you will hear the story of Luis’ life growing up in an impoverished village in Mexico and the dramatic story of how God revealed his love to Luis on the worst night of his twenty-one-year-old life after he had been assaulted by police officers and then swept into a canal filled with sewage.

The story continues with how he has lived in the U.S. and how God brought him and Wayne together in a friendship that has changed the trajectory of both of their lives.  It is an incredible story of struggle, friendship, and overwhelming grace. Look for it around mid-January.

One of the big themes for A Language of healing for a Polarized Nation is the importance of nuance. Political realities in our world push us toward one extreme or the other—binary thinking. It’s all or nothing! Those narratives are killing us.

Last night, I had dinner with a police friend of mine. Hearing him talk about the difficulty of doing his job today broke my heart. If there is any engagement between a person of color and a police officer, it is assumed the officer is racist even if the suspect is a danger to others around him. And, they know if something goes wrong, they will get little support from society or their superiors. Morale is at an all-time low.

I also have conversations with my African American friends and hear the fear in their voices of what could happen to their children if they engage law enforcement. I see the pain in their eyes when they recite the names of young black men and women who have been unnecessarily killed in those engagements.

And we can’t seem to find a healthy way to talk about the problem so we can fix it. Why is it that if there’s a disturbance in my neighborhood, I am reassured when a police officer rolls onto the scene, and others feel threatened, even though they’ve done nothing wrong? More importantly, how do we responsibly fix that?

That’s the conversation we need to be having as a culture—truly listening to each other’s concerns and finding the place to make substantive changes for a better society. But most people aren’t having that conversation, not if you listen to the media or to our political parties. They are caught in the throes of a presidential election, where both candidates and their supporters are using the current unrest to their political advantage even if it further divides us with fear and mistrust. Citizens are using violence on both sides without regard to law and order as we tap dance on the precipice of another civil war. 

We had no idea our country would be in such turmoil when we published A Language of Healing for a Polarized Nation only a few months ago. We are grateful that many people and institutions have found our book and are using it to explore more wholesome conversations about the issues that divide us. Here’s what we got from one reader recently:

A Language of Healing for a Polarized Nation is an amazing book. You not only created the best format for a multi-author book but also created a space where people can have transformative conversations. Our culture desperately needs this message. The practical steps you provided in each chapter gave me hope that change can really happen. We do not have to agree with someone to show compassion, love, and engagement.

Kyle, a reader in Colorado

Over the past few months, I’ve been involved in numerous conversations where people want to explore the nuances of our current crisis and bring people together to find solutions. I’ve done Language of Healing Live Zoom conversations to help explore those options. I’ve been asked to be a guest at many on-line book groups who are studying our book. I am convinced the vast majority of people want to have a different conversation. That’s why over the last few months Bob Prater, Arnita Taylor, and I have worked on a companion to our original book to help people conduct small group discussions about our book.

You asked us to create this resource, and today we are pleased to announce the publication of A Language of Healing Conversation Guide. This new resource will help small groups of people in neighborhoods, businesses, and schools create a safe space for people to talk with each other instead of shouting at each other. It is hot off the presses and is also available at Amazon or in discount bulk pricing at Blue Sheep Media, our publishers.

This guide can help you and people you know…

• to speak your own language of healing in your corner of the world,
• to reach out to people beyond our regular sphere of relationships, and
• to think proactively about how you might respond in difficult situations to disarm the tension and build bridges of honest dialogue and compassion.

Don’t let the media or politicians control the conversation here. Find some people you know and take the risk to discuss this book with them. You’ll be surprised at how it can turn the conversation from one of rancor and fear to mutual respect and understanding.

You can order the new Conversation Guide here.

You will be able to understand better my blog and my podcast if you don’t assume I’m in your binary box.

I reject them all. I can think beyond the false boxes politicians, media, and sometimes friends try to put me in. I think you do, too. I helped write a book about that where one of the chapters is titled, Disarming the Binary Bomb. I’m serious about that. Binary thinking is destroying this country, and many, many friendships. Binary thinking goes like this: “there are only two options here, and if you don’t fully support mine, you are my enemy.” It is the lowest form of dialogue on the planet.

If you watch a newscast or read an article and believe everything the person says, you probably need to check yourself. Everything you get is distorted by someone’s political agenda, attempts to be true to their brand, or a desperate attempt to get clicks. Whether it’s NBC News, Time Magazine, Fox News, MSNBC, or I book I’m reading, I agree with about 30% of what I hear or see in those venues. I don’t expect them to give me the unvarnished truth. The media serve mammon, after all, and politicians, their lust for power. They are not trying to tell us what’s true; they are only serving some personal interests. The more you read from diverse sources, the easier it will be to discern what’s true.

For instance, last week on The God Journey, I talked about the popular book, White Fragility, with Arnita Taylor. There is a lot I like about this book and how it helped me through some important realities in our culture. But I didn’t like everything about it. Monday morning, a news podcast I listen to attacked the book in terms I didn’t understand. I knew they hadn’t read the book but believed what someone else said about it. I read the book and appreciated much of it. Their attempts to debunk it as “total garbage” fell on deaf ears with me. 

I didn’t read it with a guilty conscience or to feel shame for my whiteness, only because I wanted to learn better how to interact with people of various colors in my life. Does the author overstate some things? Of course, she does. What author doesn’t? Do the things she exaggerates diminish the real things she points out? Not to a thinking person! It’s really OK to interact with what you read, to let some things challenge your thinking, without having to conclude it’s either all good or all bad.

So when I get an email like the one below, please don’t assume I think about the issues like you do:

I have been listening to The God Journey for about four years. The show has always been about God’s grace, but now just because the propaganda media started a Communist campaign, suddenly, you shift fears and make The God Journey a show about how white people don’t listen to black people. Black Lives Matter is funded by the Ford Foundation and other companies through Susan Rosenberg of Thousand Currents, former convicted Weather Underground and M19 communist revolutionary that was plotting to bomb buildings. I know your heart is in the right place, but you’ve been deceived. The media has so much influence that it directed you to change your show to follow the direction of their narrative. Social Justice is a Satanic deception for a Communist agenda. And this is the only reason you’ve shifted focus onto race issues. I can’t listen to your show anymore because your guilt and shame over whiteness have turned it into one more thing that hugs the curves of today’s political agendas.

The God Journey used to be a way for me to reset my attention on Jesus, and now it’s just another narrative that RESPONDS to the mainstream LEAD. Do you know where “White Privilege” came from? I’m tired of seeing Christians buy into this SJW garbage of the world, and I really think you should know that you are making all of your recent episodes of the God Journey about this topic have really turned me off from seeking out new episodes to focus on Jesus. I RESEARCH THIS STUFF HEAVILY, and it is all COMMUNISM! The goal is to divide us and conquer our nation.

(Hint: capitalizing complete words doesn’t make anyone seem more intelligent, just a bit unhinged.)

Here’s how I’d respond:

Ah, you’re welcome to stop listening; that is your privilege.

I hope you can appreciate that we are engaged in two different conversations. One is what you describe—an all-out political battle between left and right. I know the people behind the BLM organization have admitted to having Marxist leanings, and that their mission statement denigrates the nuclear family and religious faith. I don’t buy their extremist agenda, and I have not endorsed that organization in anything I’ve said. At the same time, there is a movement of “black lives matter” in our culture that is calling attention to the fact that young, innocent men are being killed by those empowered with government authority. To draw attention to that and demand that government officials be held accountable for how they treat people of color does not make me a sympathizer to Marxist doctrine. You have to separate the two to be intellectually honest. 

Black Lives Matter, as an organization, is gaining traction because we do have racial issues in our culture that many white people prefer to ignore. I would argue letters like yours only empower the Social Justice Warriors because you refuse to acknowledge the underlying problem that does real harm to people just because of the color of their skin. The “true origins” of my podcasts about race have nothing to do with their propaganda. They have risen out of my relationships with people of color and watching how they live in a very different world than I do, or my children and grandchildren. They have touched my heart and opened my eyes to the legitimate needs here, not the contrived ones by those who seek to undermine our culture. Our society is clearly weighted toward whiteness, and people of color are increasingly frustrated that we don’t care that they suffer through circumstances far more complicated than most of us endure.

So, there is a political game going on here. You’re right about that. Both sides want to divide and conquer this nation and pull it back from its powerful ideals. But I’m not playing that game. However, I am sharing this part of my journey to show what’s going on in our culture and to find solutions that are different from what BLM advocates. I’m not trying to score political points but asking people to live more generously in the world and help disarm those who would use the disparity and desperation for nefarious means of undermining our culture. President Trump has undoubtedly turned “mainstream media” into one of the most dismissive labels people can use to ignore whatever challenges their thinking. No doubt, the “mainstream media” distorts a lot of news to its political ends, but no more than Trump or his cronies at FOX. 

That is still a tiny part of all the content of my podcast (four shows out of forty-six this year). I label them clearly so that if discussions of current events aren’t of interest to you, you can easily skip them. But why people want to do so, however, was the point of the podcast last Friday. I hope that those of us who have power in the culture will find ways to share it freely with those who have for too long been marginalized. We can disagree on this, but I hope you understand better what’s motivating me. 

My utmost passion on this page and the podcast will always be to encourage people on a Jesus journey that shows you how to live loved by the Father and be a better lover in the world. I just began sharing some of the most exciting discoveries I’ve hmade ad in over a decade. It’s called Embracing His Glory and is meant to encourage people on the journey of transformation and freedom. A new release comes each Tuesday morning, and will for a while. 

So, don’t bother inviting me into your binary box. I’m not coming to join you. I’d sure welcome you, though, whenever you’re ready to give it up. 

Yes, I wanted to get your attention. I don’t triple-dog-dare anyone to do anything, though I would love for you to think through the issues the author lays out in that chapter. Please don’t let the media that amplifies the most extreme voices on the left and the right rob you of the important conversations going on about the inequities of race that still persist in our society. One of the lessons we encouraged in A Language of Healing for a Polarized Nation is not to compare the worst actions of those who disagree with you with the best intentions of those who do.

This is a good time for softer hearts not harder ones, for listening instead of pontificating. Underneath the diatribes in the media—social, mainstream, and Fox—people are exploring what it is to care for others beyond what we might consider as “their tribe.” White Fragility, the book I referenced above, is a difficult read if you’re white. I don’t love everything about this book, and some of her terminology can be off-putting, but hopefully, it will make you think. It helped me understand more why we have such a hard time communicating about this, and why those who look like me have a hard time talking about the issues that underlie racial inequities in our culture.

I know some of you grow tired of my musings on this. I like this space to help encourage people on their journey of leaning in more deeply to Jesus and to be less influenced by the world’s ways. Some have called me “liberal” and accused me of being a Democrat. I hope you can appreciate that I’m not playing politics here. I’m not pro-Republican or pro-Democrat, and I think both parties are out to exploit the tensions in our society for whatever political power (and money) they can hope to gain. They are both a huge part of the problem, and I don’t look for them to be the solution.

So, I reject the binary constructs that both of them try to force on us. Life is more nuanced than they lead us to believe.  I can bear witness to the injustices some people groups suffer in this world and be a voice for more understanding and compassion without endorsing all their agenda or approving of violence or looting.  I can decry racist acts when they happen, and still support the men and women in blue who put their lives on the line to make us a safer society. These are our first responders who valiantly rush into the most dangerous situations to disarm evil and protect the good and, if not, they should be held to account. Society in a fallen world cannot exist without them.

I write because I have good friends who are severely impacted by these issues, and silence is no longer an option, and hoping it will get better is not a strategy. What could be closer to Jesus’ heart than how we treat people who are different from us? Isn’t that what the Good Samaritan story was about? Our neighbor not only includes those who look like us or live in our neighborhoods but even more importantly, those who don’t.

My heart hurts when people who say they love Jesus are unaware of their blindness about racial issues.  I saw this on FaceBook from a friend who attended the same congregation with me many years ago. I would love to be with her when her eyes are open to see just how arrogant and racist these words are.

For those of you drinking the white privilege hype, don’t be ashamed of your station in your God-given life. I know of plenty of African Americans who are privileged. You see no matter what you do, it won’t be good enough. The black community has to figure out they are not slaves anymore. Their hurt runs deep. Only God can truly heal their hurt. We can empathize, we can stand by them. We can love them, we can lift them up when they are down. What we cannot do is heal them. Unfortunately, they have leaders who are self-serving and have not led them to other ways of dealing with injustice. We see the agenda of hate, it’s time for our Black Americans to quit being used. It’s up to them. Meanwhile quit the white privilege narrative. It’s just an agenda of shame. I’m not ashamed of who God made me to be. Don’t slap God in the face by now denying who you are. Quit your bitching….

Of course, she doesn’t see herself as a racist and made enough “loving statement” to keep herself deluded.  I hope people like her will listen to what is really being said by those around us in real pain. We can do better.  I’m seeing it happen all around me.  The reason I’m in this conversation is for people like those below who are finding a different way to see the world around them, and hopefully, be more redemptive in it.

From someone I haven’t met, who read my latest book:

I finished A Language of Healing for a Polarized Nation. I didn’t realize how much my pride and “search for the truth”, led me to justify the sufferings of others. I felt that if I admitted white privilege/advantage, I was admitting that I was inferior and less than. I justified myself and tried to “correct the narrative”. But I had never really pondered how Jesus would walk in this time. I started to feel compassion, empathy, and no longer concerned for my own “rights”. It is eye-opening to me, how much I staked my identity on being a conservative, American, instead of a son of God, who is walking in relationship with Father. I am starting to see just how dangerous tribalism is and how harmful it is to our brothers and sisters. Unfortunately, it has taken a long time for me to see, but I am excited to see the adventures that Father and I will have together, as I participate in this process of healing.

From someone in a small mountain community in the Colorado Rockies:

I wanted to express my thanks to you, Arnita and Bob for the amazing book The Language of Healing. You all not only created the best format for a multi-author book I have encountered but created a space where people can have meaningful conversations that can transform lives. The message of the book was something we so desperately need in our culture and has only been magnified over the past few weeks. Imagine if more of us had been reaching outside “our group” and been listening to understand others over the years. These types of conversations might have led directly to the saving of people’s lives.  I am hopeful that recent tragic events will spur more of us on to form relationships with those who are different than us. And from my perspective it is on the individual and community level where real transformation will take place. Your focus on personal connection and the practical steps you provided in each chapter is what gives me the hope that change can really happen. I found the book engaging but challenging in many good ways. And where Papa has been directing my attention is on engaging and showing empathy for working class folks in my community (almost entirely white) who hold very different political, economic and racial views.

From a twenty-one-year-old woman:

The murder of George Floyd did not happen in a vacuum. Rather, the tragedy was a symptom of a much larger, multifaceted problem. I like to use a pyramid analogy to think about racism here in America. The act of murder is at the top point of the pyramid. Individual, perhaps seemingly “smaller” acts of racism lay the foundation of the pyramid. These smaller acts include implicit biases, racial slurs, stereotypes, other microaggressions, and color-blindness. These “small” acts fit into the pyramid and eventually lead to devastating, tragic, life-sucking acts such as the murder of George Floyd. The murder of George Floyd was simply a bubbling over that reveals the race culture in American that often lies beneath the surface.

The thing is, these “small” acts truly aren’t so small. Each one contributes to a negative racial culture. Each one is damaging. Furthermore, silence is also damaging. While I may not use a racial slur myself, if my friend says one, and I don’t use my agency to speak up for my black brothers and sisters, I am creating damage too. My silence implies complicity and consent.

As a white female, I am striving to do what I can to disrupt the culture of silence and to help dismantle America’s negative racial culture starting with destroying the bottom of the pyramid. If more of us can speak up, using our voices to proclaim the equal worth of every human being, I have hope that we can crush the pyramid before it reaches the top.

Finally, while I want to use my voice to speak out against all forms of racial discrimination, I also want to be an empathetic listener for my black brothers and sisters. I will never truly fathom what it is like to a black person in America. And I should never pretend to.

From an African-American mother of two young boys in the Carolinas:

Then came the riots. Pain and frustration followed. This is not the way to solve it. But I get the pain! I can see why some feel like enough is enough! But I know in my heart violence is not the answer. I know my hope is in Jesus. I can quote scriptures to back that up, but sometimes life sucks. And I’m learning to sit in the tension of the pain and tears and being honest with that, knowing that Jesus is right there with me. He’s weeping too and understands my pain.

My husband and I have had some very interesting conversations with our respective friends over the last week. They have been so draining and all consuming, but mostly positive and definitely worth it. I’m thankful that my friends have felt comfortable enough to share and want to discuss. We are doing deep. I even had one friend who said that her eyes were open to systemic racism for the first time. I’m shocked, but so grateful! I listened to more of The Language Of Healing today and it’s been so good to get back into it. I have the book and the audible version. What an on-time book! So grateful that the three of you followed the Holy Spirit’s lead to put that together. You complement each other super well and each brings something uniquely important to the table. It’s beautiful.

I’m taking a moment to share this because I want to say thank you. Thank you for being in my community. Thank you for giving me hope. That you are willing to use your leverage and possibly lose friends in order to speak up on behalf of those whose voice goes unheard. Human dignity is human dignity. Period.

We can do better than the options the media give us.  Find your way into new relationships laced with compassion and the willingness to understand. Don’t just look for voices that only confirm what you already think. Read and explore outside your comfort zone and see what Father might want to shift in your thinking. If nothing else, your comfort zone will expand, and you’ll be a safer place for people to approach.

First, Sara and I had a great trip to Denver to be with our son and his girlfriend, Karen. We put on a lot of miles, over a thousand each way.  We took our two dogs with us in a rented RV so we could maintain our anti-COVID bubble.  It all worked out great. Well, except for being mistaken for drug mules and having our vehicle sniffed out by a drug-detecting canine. After wasting our time and theirs, they allowed us to continue.

But the real reason for this post is to alert you to our Language of Healing Live session today at 2:00 pm PDT. Vince Coakley (pictured with Wayne above), a good friend and the host of The Vince Coakley Show in Charlotte, NC and Greenville, SC will be our moderator. We will be discussing the first chapter of A Language of Healing for a Polarized Nation: A Fork in the Road.

Our society is certainly at yet another fork in the road. This book was all but getting lost in the pandemic before the racial events of the last few weeks brought it center stage again. We stand at the crossroads of whether we can find more meaningful changes to set our culture on a better past with equity of justice and opportunity for all, or whether it will all quiet down again until the next incident.

I’m voting for the former, but it is not likely to happen where the extremists on both sides control the narratives. If we’re going to see lasting change we have to have a different conversation, and unfortunately, our political leaders are not showing us the way.

Let’s discuss how we can choose a better path that leads to healing rather than more division. This is the fourth in a series of A Language of Healing Live events that we are posting on FaceBook. (You can view past ones here.)

The event is now over, but you can view the YouTube recording here.

This is a propitious time for our country that can mark an upward trajectory of equal justice for all, or devolve into greater division and anger. We can all be part of a better solution.