I absolutely love stories of God’s transforming work in other people’s lives, and judging from the mail I get in response to the ones I post, I realize they are very encouraging for others as well. These are not easy-fix stories, but stories of transformation God has been working over them for some time. Often we may not think he’s doing anything at all, then something happens to show us that he has in fact been working deeply and now when the sprout finally emerges from the soil, we can see and enjoy the splendor of his working.
Wayne, I am reading once again He Loves Me! This must be my third or fourth reading of it, the last time being a couple years or so ago. I “noticed” it the other day in my stack of books and today I went to pick it up once again, and wanted to share something that you wrote in it that is what God wanted me to see. I can’t seem to get past this part.
First, earlier in my morning He has shown me how He has called me to Himself to relieve me of my orphan spirit. He knows how much I need Him, my Father. A real Father. Sitting there soaking that in was/is wonderful. After a time, I recalled my “noticing” it and went to read it once again.
In the very beginning, where you wrote how you come to meetings early to mingle and get into conversations with the people, and how they are restful and relaxed in your presence until, that is, they find out that you are the speaker/author. You go on to write how God has that same problem with us, and how He had to disguise Himself as a man in order to have us relaxed enough after we get through the awkward stages of beginning to know someone enough to be ourselves. (pages 18 – 20)
I am seeing. He is revealing Himself to me, His good intentions toward me, and most of all, it’s HIS idea to be in relationship with me. This changes everything! Oh, I so hope to be growing in being loved. That’s all I want, to be loved, and know it, and if there will ever be a testimony that I carry around, that this would be it. Not out of my mouth but just because I am living loved.
This time, it’s different. These aren’t just words I am reading, something going into my mind that I can agree mentally with. No, this time these aren’t just words alone, for along with them I am hearing my Father’s Voice. His Voice! Just a day or two ago, I realized there is a Voice! …and now I am hearing Him while reading this book.
It’s not just “reading” I am doing though. He is cradling me in His arms or something as I go along in it, and ..I can’t describe this at all. This is more than just having a witness of the Holy Spirit in me, or having my spirit respond. No, there is perhaps, love? Surrounding me? Compassion?
A Voice. His Voice. Until two days ago, I don’t know if I ever heard it. Now, while in your book (and I’m only on p. 45). His Voice of Love is here speaking to me, all around me. Oh, I hope that His Voice becomes stronger!
I see now due to what you wrote, that I am getting past the angry God I thought He was, and even beyond the Powerful God that He truly is, and coming to this place, this place that is His true Voice, the Voice of Love. It’s getting past being in awe of Him, and I don’t mean that disrespectfully, but to honestly be in conversation with Him. It’s been so slow, but I am reminded of what you wrote, that this is what I can look forward to the rest of my time here on earth and, most likely, beyond.
I am helpless in that. Only HE can, and He has not given up on me, and now that I have more of a taste of a true Father’s love, I so want to know more. I don’t want to live as an orphan anymore. No, not at all. Thanks for helping me. The Holy Spirit has used your talents many times to bring me out of that orphan mentality and spirit.
Wow! I am so thrilled at what Father is consummating in you in this season of your life. I am blessed that my book has been part of that, but I think it is just the symptom of a greater work he is doing? Why is my book different this time? Because of the work he has been doing in you all along. Now, youâ€™re getting to see some of that fruit in renewed relationship with him. But Iâ€™m not silly enough to think my book can produce that; it can only help identify it. What God does in us takes a long time. It mostly goes on where we canâ€™t see it, and then one day somehow the veil gets pulled back and we see what heâ€™s been doing all along to draw us closer to his side and set us ever-more free in his life.