I’m nine days out now on this trip through Georgia and the Carolinas. I’ve met some incredible people, participated in some awesome conversations and have had some incredible blessed moments, just dropped in by God that have enriched my own journey. But I miss Sara immensely. Two more days, however, and I’m on my way home. I enjoy the connections God gives when I’m on the road and the work he accomplishes, bu for someone who would rather be home every night of his life it makes me wonder why I do this. And then i get a note like this, and I am reminded of why he asks it of me.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for visiting with us last weekend. I trust that the rest of your trip has been wonderful. It’s funny how I still hold so many expectations in my life. I had expectations about your visit, and of course they weren’t met. What I pictured beforehand is not what happened (it had nothing to do with you, but I had expectations on myself and others who came to join us). What happened instead was that God quietly worked on my heart in the 24 hours after you left.
I had been suffering a lot lately from insomnia and a general restlessness of spirit. What I know now is that I’ve been wrestling over who God is. Sunday afternoon’s conversation was the breakthrough. You were talking about the Cross. I had heard it before from Transitions and the podcasts, but sometimes you have to hear something over and over before it takes root. I know I mentioned my struggle with the OT and NT God seeming to be two different people. You gave me the piece of the puzzle that brought it all together.
I get it now!!!!!!!!!! HE LOVES US!! He reached into the OT times in the only way they could handle Him then!! He really doesn’t do anything apart from love! I am so excited!! I finally understand what His wrath really is. Wayne, I will never be the same. I even feel like I can handle reading scriptures again now that I am more fully settled on His loving nature.
This revelation did not come to me Sunday afternoon. It came quietly with no fanfare over the day following. I suddenly realized that everything was different.
I know face-to-face encounters are often helpful in moving the journey forward for some people. What I love about this note is that it really points out the work God does in a life. Sometimes our conversations can be a catalyst for that, but in the end the glory is all his. And at the end of it all, I still get to go home to Sara!