17 Hours Over 4 Days

On my recent trip to Kansas, I got to enjoy one of my favorite weeks of the year. Teaching at the HIV/AIDs Intervention School at the YWAM base there, I got to have 15 students for 17 hours of concentrated discussion over four days where we get to eat, fellowship, and live together while each are sorting out what Father is doing in them to invite them deeper into his life.

My course title is God’s Compassion For the Afflicted, but to get there we deal with the entire paradigm shift from thinking religiously about God’s life and helping them think relationally. That means we have to untangle some of the religious wiring and help people embrace a new covenant paradigm as to how God wants to work in us and through us. Some of the things God sorts out in folks during this time are…

  • Learning to live in God as the Affectionate Father not the Demanding Taskmaster (Rom 8:15).

  • Watching that relationship change our Pharisaical contempt for the world into heart-felt compassion for those lost and lonely in the darkness.

  • Losing confidence in our own efforts and agenda to accomplish his work, and freeing us to simply live alongside Jesus each day and watch what he does through us.

  • Redefining life in the church not as our participation in services, assent to theology or belonging to an organization, but in growing, free relationships with other fellow-travelers.

  • Experience the reality of growing trust in Father’s character and work and seeing how that transforms our self-focused lives to live freely and powerfully in his desires.

Of course all that doesn’t happen in a few days, but it can help people begin on this journey, or encourage those already on it to go much further down the way. This summer the Kansas base is taking this training on the road to Durban, South Africa and I hope to go if the Lord desires. I recently saw a video from there where 48% of the people living in one township of 400,000 people are HIV positive. This disease is literally ravaging Africa and I am so blessed to know those who have it on their hear to go and help. I also heard that as many people are dying with AIDS every 22 days as those who were killed in the recent tsunami. Imagine a tragedy like that that has become so commonplace it no longer makes the news.

As I said at the outset, dealing with these realities is my favorite thing to do with a group of people. The YWAM environment puts this in a classroom environment, but I find it even more effective in a home over a weekend with a group of people who are ready to rethink the life of the new covenant away from the religious packaging we’ve but on it for the past 2000 years. This process is highly interactive and the relationships it spawns are always a great blessing to me. Some start this process deeply embedded in religion and don’t even know it. Usually the first couple of days can be a bit threatening. Others respond like camels to an oasis, finding that the things Jesus brings up answer some of the deepest cries of their heart. As one said to me, “This was the whole purpose God sent us here.”

The great transition the church needs to undergo today is not from meeting in buildings to meeting in homes, but moving from doing Christianity as a religion, to living freely in the life of Jesus. That will change how we think about body life, but it goes far deeper than that. Of course all that doesn’t happen in a few days, but it can help people begin on this journey, or encourage those already on it to go much further down the way.

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Perspective from Far Side of the World: A Day in the Life of Banda Aceh

A friend sent me this excerpt from a diary of a relief pilot working in the tsunami relief efforts in Indonesia. This was probably three weeks into the relief effort and I’d encourage you to take the time to read it. It will give you a heart for the crisis there and those who serve in the midst of it. I find stories like this are a great way to get perspective on my own life. Living in the abundance and decadence of Western culture a
This was written by Andy McCain, a helicopter pilot in Indonesia, and is reprinted here with his permission. If you’d like to write a note of encouragement to he or his wife, Tammy, you can do so at ATMcCain@pobox.com.

I am sending you a snap shot of what kind of an average day is like, as we go about the day to day of meeting the needs of the hurting and helpless of Banda Aceh. I am changing the names of the people we serve, as I do not want to expose anybody to publicity that they may not want.

3:30 AM: I awake to the sound of the water tower next to my tent clanging away like it is being beat with a hammer, as steel framework twits and turns in the pre-dawn air. My air mattress is also shaking and rolling, kind of giving me the feeling that I may be surfing away at any moment. What is going on I wonder, then I realize that it is just one of the usual early morning earth quakes that likes to wake us up in the wee hours of the morning. Only a 6.5 this morning on the richer scale we find out later in the day. Nothing to worry about. Found out later some of my teammates ran out of the house fearing it may collapse. I had to chuckle a bit. The people of Banda Aceh have been through so much, the sight of 2 approaching middle aged westerners running out in the yard in their underwear may have pushed them over the edge. Good thing it was still nice and dark and nobody could see the horror of that sight.

Shaking subsides to a small follow on tremor. I roll back over for a few more winks, as I know we are facing a busy day. At 4:30 AM, the local neighborhood mosque announces it is time to get up with the morning call to prayer. Sigh, lay there for about a half hour and then crawl out of my tent to begin a new day. Morning shower is dipped out of a cement bat or water tank with a plastic dipper. Nice bathroom even equipped with an Indonesian squat pot—luxury living at its best. I say that tongue and check, realizing that I know I am so blessed by what we have here. There are thousands of refuges with nothing more than a plastic tent for shelter, knowing that if there is no relief flights today, there will be no food or water for them and their families on this day.

6:00 AM breakfast arrives, cooked by our neighbor lady. Nice Muslim family who have been very friendly to us, and appreciate our concern and compassion for their people. We have provided the funds for food, and she does the cooking. Breakfast is nasi goring (fried rice) and eggs sunny side up topped with a few nice red hot peppers. That will get even the most tired eyes wide open once you chop down on these little morsels. You can quench the flames in your mouth with sweet tea, made Indonesian style, with enough sugar to float a ship. Wonderful way to begin a bold new day in Banda Aceh.

6:30 AM we are leaving the house as the first rays of the morning sun are streaking the eastern ranges around Banda Aceh with a soft orange/red glow. We had originally planned to leave the house around 7 AM, but during the night, we had an urgent phone call from “Folks with many Doctors”. Seemed the team we had inserted late in the afternoon day before, had come into contact with members of the resistance movement. Fearing any problems, were asking for an emergency extract first thing in the morning. We had huddled up quickly during the night, and opted to get going early on this extract so we could get them out for peace of mind, and keep the flight schedule on track for the relief supplies. The drive to the airport is a study in contrasts, as beautifully kept rice paddies wiz by near the airport, and people are careening in and out of traffic on motor scooters and motorcycles with sidecars. The amount of goods and people you can pack on a motor scooter can only be seen to be believed. Reality comes crashing in though as we pass the mass grave site, the earth moving equipment is silent now almost peaceful in the early
dawn light. We all realize in a few moments, they will be belching thick diesel smoke as they move mound after mound of dirt to accommodate the victims, both young and old that will be arriving by truckload during the day to the mass grave site. I have to look away for a moment, and think of home and family, we hold our breaths while passing by the mass grave area this morning. You can’t breath in this morning without feeling sick.

6:45 AM We are uncovering HCM (the helicopter) to get her ready for another days action in the skies over Banda Aceh. James from Australia is helping me push 55-gallon drums through the sticky mud from the nights monsoon deluge at the airport, so we can fuel HCM. Joel who handles the flight scheduling, also from Australia is busy opening up the helicopter for our first load of cargo to go in along with bringing out the distressed team from “Folks with many Doctors”. My teammate is up taking the covers off the main rotor head and the engine that help keep out the deluge of rain during the night. Across the flight line we can already hear the chop of the Australian Army Hueys as they are already taking into the air. All over the flight line engines are coming on line and blades are turning up.

7:10 AM We are fueled, loaded up, turned up and calling the control tower for departure clearance. Much as expected I am told to go and report 5 minutes out. Flying here is defiantly the “wild wild west”, right now. There are no rules to speak of, and very little control except maintain 1000 feet outbound and 500 coming in and nobody should be hurt at the end of the day. See and avoid is the survival rule of the day from an aviation standpoint. We make the pick up of the “Folks with Many Doctors”, they are quite relived to see us. Back to base at Banda Aceh, call tower next to Sultan pass, getting a call in edgewise is like pulling hen’s teeth. Tower says report left base to the helicopter spots realizing, that I will be lucky to get a turning final call out before landing. We usually settle for a safe on the ground call to the control tower.

8:10 AM The team of doctors and their emergency triage kits from “Folks in the western US” has arrived for transport a hard hit village called Lamno about 25 minutes flying to the south and is ready to go. HCM is out bound on what will be the routine for this day, and all the other days. We head outbound as I pass over the coastal side of Banda Aceh city, and see the devastation below me. I can’t help but think of the young man at the airport who told us how he had been married for only a month. How excited he and his wife had been when she landed a job at one of the better stores in the lower part of town. I looked down and wondered in all the wreckage which was the store that she had worked in? Newly weds looking forward to a happy life together. Home and a family, now the young groom can not even find his bride to give her a proper good bye, she like thousands of others lost to mountain of water that crashed ashore here. I am glad in many ways that I am busy flying, getting position reports out on the radio, and watching out for all the other air traffic. The busyness and attention demanded by flying in a high traffic environment like a major relief operation, does not allow my mind to have time to wander and reflect for to long on the devastation passing below us.

I make two more relief flights by 1 PM, in-between

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Myths About Those Who Have Moved Outside The Box

I ran across an interesting article today by Alan Jaimieson (a New Zealander) in Reality Magazine titled Ten Myths of Church Leavers,. Of course, I wish he had used another term for the Sunday morning box since the church of Jesus Christ in the world is larger than any box can contain, and you really don’t leave the church by quitting one of those boxes. Be that as it may, I found his observations and conclusions to be compelling.

Here is his opening paragraphs to whet your appetite:

Despite the almost mantra-like status of the statement “people are leaving the church” there still appears to be little understanding about who is leaving, when they leave, why they leave, and what happens to them and their faith after they leave. Of course everyone has their own view on these issues but few, especially our church leaders, have taken the time to sit down and talk with an actual leaver or two.

It is much easier dealing with stereotypes than actual people, even if the stereotypes don’t help us understand what is really going on. For those interested in moving beyond the stereotypes and asking: “Who are these people who are leaving our churches?” an examination of some myths about church leavers may prove helpful.

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Finding Unity in Father’s Family

A friend sent me this clip of an article written by a brother in Japan, Kokichi Kurosaki. I like how he deals with this.

One might think that with the Bible as the center of Christianity, the unity of Christians could be easily realized. Unfortunately, this has not proved to be true. This inability of Scripture to unify the Lord’s people proves that the letter of the Bible cannot really replace the living Christ as the center of our faith. The Bible speaks to us of the Life and work of God, and since ”life” is greater than its manifestation, it cannot be expressed completely in any logical or theological form. Therefore, the Bible itself cannot escape being understood in many different ways. Thus we see how, in the wisdom of God, it is impossible to make the Scriptures the end or final authority in themselves, for they only express God’s authority to those who live in fellowship with the Spirit.

Let us pause to remember. In rejecting the authority of the Roman Church, the reformers turned to the Scriptures as the authority for their faith and actions. In the fierce conflict of the early days of the Reformation, it was natural that they should seek the security of some objective standard to meet the seemingly unlimited politico-ecclesiastical power of Rome. Therefore the position of the Bible as the God-inspired testimony of the apostles’ personal faith in Christ gradually changed and became the source of Protestant ”dogma” and the criterion of acceptable faith. Replacing the Roman pope, the Bible became the center of Protestant churches.

And so on the one hand there are the so-called fundamentalists who, accepting the Bible as the ”infallible Word of God,” believe there is no mistake in the whole Bible, not even in one phrase or manner of wording. To them it is, in the most literal sense, the Word of God from cover to cover, and their faith is utterly dependent on its literal infallibility.

On the other hand there are liberals who try to compromise Biblical truth with science. Denying the spiritual in favor of the rational, or adopting the results of the higher and lower criticism, they reject the inspiration of the whole Bible.

There are yet others, though, who take the whole Bible to be the word of God as do the fundamentalists, but in a little different way. They believe that the Spirit acts in the words of the historical records to reveal the Living Word. They recognize the Bible as the record of God’s revelation of Himself throughout history, climaxing in Christ–an inspirited record resulting from the activity of the Spirit in the individuals who wrote it. There is only one center of Christianity, and this center is spiritual fellowship with God through Christ–life union with God in Christ. When there is this koinonia–fellowship–there is the Body of Christ, the Ekklesia. The Ekklesia exists where there is this life-union with God through Christ. Only this union with God in Christ can be the center of Christianity.

The only caveat I would offer, is not to see that life union in Christ as someone who agrees with what we think, or sees church the way we see church. I find people with the marks of the Spirit’s life in them in all kinds of places, even if they haven’t been through the same experiences I’ve been through. God has many ways to work his life into people. As we recognize his presence in each other, we’ll be less likely to seek out only the ‘like-minded’ and find incredible fellowship in lots of places God might lead us.

A friend of mine in Australia talks about recognizing the fragrance of Father in others. I like that. That’s why you come away from some relationships hungry for more, and others wanting a bit less. It doesn’t matter whether they see things the way you do or not, but whether we can see Father is at work in them to make his life known. After all, unity is a gift God gives his children. It is something we can only recognize and celebrate, not something we can produce by our own efforts. That’s why Jesus prayed for his Father to do it instead of asking the disciples to.

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Professional Athletes and the God of the Ages

For those outside the US, yesterday was our high pagan ritual to professional sports—the Super Bowl! Now I enjoy watching football, but I always feel my jaw clench whenever I hear one of our professional athletes try to invoke God’s in the process. Usually what comes out trivializes the God I love.

That was true yesterday hearing Terrell Owens credit God’s healing powers for his ability to play after breaking his ankle six weeks ago. “A lot of people in the world didn’t believe I could play, but my faith alone—the power of prayer and the power of faith carried me along the way.” I am certainly in no place to make a judgment as to whether God healed him or not, but with so many other dire needs in the world, I doubt having Mr. Owens in that football game was high on his priority list. I will be with someone tomorrow who has a severely handicapped child and who questions every day the reality of God’s love for her and her daughter. I can’t imagine how she feels if she thinks God has the power to fix an ankle for an over-paid and way-too-arrogant athlete while ignoring her cries of normalcy for her daughter.

But then professional athletes are not known for their sense of proportion. And I honestly feel for them. Can you imagine what it would be like to live your whole life measured every moment by your performance? They are adored, only for what they can produce, and when that goes so will their adulation by the crowds. If you want to see how shame distorts our lives, you need look no further than the boasting or blaming by those who have had to live by their performance the most. It’s no wonder they can only see God as a success-deity who will stop at nothing to make them succeed. Except when he doesn’t.

A few months ago another famous football player passed away unexpectedly at 43. Reggie White was a defensive tackle for the Green Bay Packers and well known for his personal faith. Yes, when his team won the Super Bowl, he said something a bit ridiculous like this victory was proof that God had sent him to Green Bay. I always wonder what the losing players feel at times like this. Is their loss proof that they missed God’s will?

After Reggie’s death, however, an interesting story emerged. You didn’t see it in the major press, but a few reporters covered it. It seemed at the end of his life, Reggie was on a bit of a spiritual journey that had taken him outside the whole structure of organized religion. He had stopped attending Sunday services and stopped preaching to congregations around the country. Why? It could have been the fact that after raising hundreds of thousands of dollars to rebuild an inner city church facility that had been burned to the ground in Knoxville, TN, the pastor he did it for was arrested for spending the money on cocaine. He began to question whether the money he raised would have been more helpful going directly to those who need it instead of paying for ostentatious buildings or salaries of so-called church leaders. Or, it could have been his growing awareness that people who came to hear him speak were more excited about seeing Reggie White than coming face to face with Jesus Christ.

Whatever it was, he quit! He told ESPN/s Andrea Kramer that he hadn’t been in a church building for four years and was on a journey to find out who God really was. He was still a passionate man for the Lord Jesus but had lost confidence in the institutions that had grown up in his wake. When he died, Reggie was on a journey to discover who God really was rather than to trust what he had been told about him. What a story! Isn’t it sad that he had to get away from football to recognize that God wasn’t who he thought he was? That’s what gives me hope for the rest of them.

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Living Redemptively In the Culture

Last night Sara and I went to see Hotel Rwanda and were absolutely stunned by the power of the performances and the tragedy of the story it unfolds. As a million people were being killed in a tribal genocide the West stood by impotently ignoring the death and devastation. We didn’t care enough about the value of African lives to intervene and stop the carnage. This is the story of one man who put his life on the line when he did not have to and saved the lives of nearly 1300 people who would otherwise would have been raped and slaughtered.

I saw that movie this week in the climate of a number of Christian commentators condemning another Oscar-nominated movie, Million Dollar Baby for a plot twist they say sanctions an act that they are hotly debating in our culture. I won’t give the movie away, but just because a movie depicts a horrible act, does not necessarily validate that act. I found this movie to be a masterpiece, with characters you come to care deeply about and the plot twist only underlies the tragedy of a life uncentered in the reality of a Living God. This is a gut-wrenching movie that captures the desperation of the human drama without a deeper reason for living than one’s own personal happiness.

What bothers me is that so-called Christian commentators take up more air time blasting Million Dollar Baby instead of championing the redemptive theme and courage of the hotel manager in Hotel Rwanad. Perhaps that is because they don’t understand it. Both are compelling stories with some incredible lessons. They certainly are not escapist entertainment, but thought-provoking films that will trouble your emotions. I came away from both of them more resolved to live my life deeper in Jesus and let him make it available to folks got in the despair of their own loneliness or the violence of someone else’s anger.

So why do commentators have to make a target of one of them and ignore the other? Follow the money. They know that more people will attend Million Dollar Baby for all their complaining, the same way some Jewish groups did last year for The Passion of the Christ. But they also know that the media will crave their ranting and it will bring them increased personal exposure and more money in their fund-raising efforts. It’s a despicable game being played for the destruction of our cultural fabric.

It is often said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” But what good men do is to risk their lives in the face of evil as the lead in Hotel Rwanda not to use controversy to build their own following on Fox News and line their own pockets from an angry constituency. The challenge for us all is how we stand up to the evil that surrounds us each day—that which foments the anger in our culture instead of healing it, and that which dehumanizes others by its own self-indulgence.

I want to live squarely in the fullness of Jesus’ life today, doing whatever he asks of me to be a redemptive influence in my culture. If you need encouragement to do that, go and see Hotel Rwanda. It will humble you while it makes your spirit soar!

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Letting God Unpack Your Anger

Every notice how angry Christians are? I honestly think it is the direct result of the system of religious obligation that has co-opted so much of the life of Christ for believers. I remember how angry it made me—angry at God for not doing what I thought he should do, angry at other believers for not working as hard as I was and angry at the world for their sin which seemed to make them so happy. Even now in my work with BridgeBuilders it is almost invariably true that the angriest people in the room are those representing the Christian agenda. We’re right, by God, and we’re going to make you see it our way.

Even those who spill out of that system seem to carry their anger for while, especially when somebody challenges their lack of Sunday morning attendance, or some other nonsense. I was reminded of that with some of the responses I saw to Just What Is the Church? Blog that I wrote about a recent Christianity Today article telling us we all need to get back inside the institution, even if it is painful and doesn’t work. Sure he’s got a crazy perspective, but he doesn’t merit our anger or frustration.

I remember almost a decade ago visiting my parents at a time when close friends were spreading lies about me. I was so angry I had to get away and spend some time in the mountains praying. I dropped my stuff off at their house and was headed out for a long walk when my Dad stopped me. “Let me read you something I read this morning, that might be helpful to you.” He read from Luke 7 in The Message:

Count yourself blessed every time someone cuts you down or throws you out, every time someone smears or blackens your name to discredit me. What it means is that truth is too close for comfort and that that person is uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—skip like a lamb even, if you like!—for even though they don’t like it, I do…and all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company; my preachers and witnesses have always been treated like this.


I’ve got to tell you that I wasn’t impressed right away. How could I be glad that other people were molesting my reputation? Somehow in those next few hours of prayer, however, God began to make that real to me. My life in him is not victimized by anyone else’s negative, even angry, attacks on me. I could live free of that realizing that his life sorting itself out in me will threaten others at times and make me the focus of their anger. As I began to see that I was merely taking the brunt of anger the really felt toward God, not only was I able to view them with more compassion, I began to understand my own anger as well.
One of the things I enjoy so much about this journey is how Father has disarmed so much of my anger and even when I run into people who are absolutely angry at me and the life I live, it doesn’t ruin my day or threaten my life in him. Jesus told us exactly how his grace in us would respond to people like that further down in Luke 7:

I tell you, love your enemies. Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it Live out of this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind.

Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you wan the same treatment. Don’t condemn those who are done; that hardness can boomerang. Be easy on people’ you’ll find life a lot easier. Give away your life’ you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back with bonus and blessing. Giving, not giving, is the way. Generosity begets generosity…”

There is no way we can choose to live like this in our own efforts, so don’t make this a new set of rules to follow. They will kill you. But we can choose to let Father work his love in us so that we find ourselves increasingly living in this freedom. Ask him! He’s really good at this!

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Enough Guilt And A Terrified Squirrel Can Work Wonders

If you have not ever heard Ray Stevens’ song The Mississippi Squirrel you really owe yourself the treat! I first laughed at this back in the 70’s when it was a hit, but have played it often at workshops I do, for the humor and the truth it contains. Someone sent me this link today. With apologies to Pascagoula, Mississippi. It shows just how easy it is to start a revival if enough guilt and a squirrel are in the same room.

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Just What Is The Church?

An Open Letter to Tim Stafford

In the current issue of Christianity Today, author Tim Stafford in an article entitled The Church—Why Bother, states, “There is no healthy relationship with Jesus without a relationship to the church.” Here is my response to that article.

Dear Tim,

Could I invite you to take a walk with me? There are some people I’d like you to meet that might help you rethink your recent article. And you can pick the destination, because just about anywhere you want to go I could find some brothers and sisters your article adresses. I could introduce you to Kevin and Val in Australia, John and Mary in New Zealand, Paul and Kim in Portland, David and Nina in Ireland, Stan and Mavis in England, Jack and Nancy in Maine, David and Rachel in California and hundreds more I know around the globe.

If you’d take a moment to sit down with them you’ll discover they’re part of this 23 million people who claim to know Jesus but do not attend a Sunday morning service. I have no doubt you would have the time of your life fellowshipping with them. Their faith is powerful and real. They are experiencing a transformation in God’s grace that they never found in an institution and they demonstrate a passionate commitment to the church of Jesus Christ that any Sunday service couldn’t begin to let them express.

At one time these were all full-time pastors or leaders, developing successful congregations in any outward sense you’d care to measure. But in time they grew unsettled with lack of spiritual growth and healthy relationships that congregational life produced. Attempts at renewal either fell on deaf ears or never fulfilled the passion on their heart. They began to wonder if the institutional dynamics and cumbersome ritual wasn’t undermining that passion. They all left it years ago after decades of trying to make it better, and they have never looked back.

All of them lost confidence in the congregational system to bring people into the fullness of what it means to love God and live in supportive relationships with other believers. None of them left it easily and they hold no ill will toward those who still find help and comfort in those institutions you recognize as church. They affirm the body of Christ in whatever expression he chooses to make himself known, whether it is a service in a building or an informal group gathered in a home. And if you want to add to them former elders, Sunday school teachers, deacons and committed parishioners the number would swell well into the thousands. And that’s just the people I know.

Not all who have forsaken their connections with the institutional church have done it out of laziness, selfishness or independence. These didn’t leave in abandonment of their faith, but as the only thing they could see to do to continue living the reality of their faith. In all my years in institutional congregations I’ve never seen people more active in spiritual growth, more willing to lay down their lives to serve others and more free to live as the body of Christ all week long rather than confining it to a meeting or two each week.

What many of us have found on the outside offers more connection, more transformation, more opportunities for ministry than we ever found inside. Does it ever bother you that if Jesus wanted us to be part of these institutions with morning services, he did nothing in the Gospels to prepare his disciples for it? On the contrary his example and words were far more de-centralized than that. Love each other as you’ve been loved. Where two or three of you get together I’ll be there with you. He didn’t envision church as a building, an institution or a service. He viewed it as a company of people following him, sharing his life with each other and serving the world with compassion and humility. For the first 300 years in the life of the church believers met in homes and would never have conceived of the Lord’s Supper being served any where other than the family table?

I know our Christian institutions are fading and the last thing they want anyone to believe is that we can flourish in the life of Jesus and in real connections with other believers outside its influence. But I’m afraid the tide has turned. People are beginning to awaken to a reality of God’s life together that cannot be contained by any institution. Those who claim otherwise sound like bankers in the 1920s trying to assure people their money was safe inside so they won’t all try to withdraw it and find out otherwise.

In the end we would all agree with you that growth in Christ and mission to the world are greatly stilted without vital connections to the church of Jesus Christ. We would just define the term ‘church’ differently. We’ve found that connection to be far more real and effective in ever-deepening relationships with fellow believers than in sitting in a pew, contributing time and money to a program that less and less reflects the kingdom realities that Jesus taught.

And we would take exception to your conclusion that, “A living, breathing congregation is the only place to live in a healthy relationship to God. That is because it is the only place on earth where Jesus has chosen to dwell.” We have found that he does not dwell in buildings made with hands, but lives first and foremost in the human heart at every moment and in every corner of our lives. Our relationships with other believers isn’t a substitute or that presence, only a fuller expression of it.

Your brother and fellow-pilgrim,

Wayne

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When ‘Ministry’ Runs Amuck

Sara and I are continuing through Blue Like Jazz and enjoying lots of wonderful observations. In one chapter he finds himself teaching a college group at a local congregation. He substituted one Sunday, only to turn out to become the college pastor the next few weeks because they liked his teaching so much. He describes a process too often repeated in people who have a heart for ministry in honest terms one rarely hears:

“I swam in the attention and the praise. I loved it. I lusted for it. I almost drowned in it. “

And he wasn’t kidding. After a year or more he discovers that his teaching has replaced his own relationship with God. In a quote worth the price of the whole book, he writes:

“I have become an infomercial for God, and I don’t even use the product.”

When he realizes how empty his life became while teaching a class that everyone loves, he goes to the pastor to resign saying he’s leaving for awhile. The pastor tries to talk him out of it, but Don knows something isn’t right and he needs to sort it out. He tries to explain to his befuddled leader why he is going away.

“Because I can’t be here anymore. I don’t feel whole here. I feel, well, partly whole,. Incomplete. Tired… Something got crossed in the wires and I became the person I should be and not the person I am. It feels like I should go back and get the person I am and bring him here to the person I should be.”

That’s what religion does to you. In pretending to be what we’re not we lose sight of who we are. How can recognize the presence of the Living God beckoning us to his life if we are so busy pretending to be what we think we should be instead of letting God have us just as we are. God doesn’t live in our fantasies. He lives in reality. Part of learning to see him clearly is emptying ourselves of all that we use to hide behind. It may be a painful process, but it will allow us to once again connect with the Father who loves us so much and who is the only one who can put our lives back together.

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