I’m going to let Hilda write my blog today. I received this email from her a few days ago:
I really enjoyed the Urban Mystic podcast you were on. So much of what you said made me sit back quietly and ponder on the ideas. One of those things was “God being on the other side of my brokenness.” It resonates so well with me as this realization is what also changed my life.
I love how Jesus grabbed Peter “at once” when he started to sink. (Matthew 14:31). The accuser’s voice always demands that I reach “perfection” first before receiving God’s approval. What a paradigm shift it is when you realize “He’s got me,” and loves me first. The accuser’s voice does not equal God’s voice.
Thank you for continuously sharing with us your journey with a loving Father. So many times, your voice has helped me to fight the accuser’s voice in some dark moments. I believe this is God’s work and I also know that your sharing words contribute to God’s glory in my life.
The reality of having a performance-driven first part of my life is that I so often find myself a few steps ahead of prayer and ultimately out of sync with Jesus. More than once, I’ve found myself chasing after my well-trained, self-reliant tactics. But, Jesus settled me once again and His words in John 15:5 take on an eternal life-giving meaning: “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
When I live in that space of confidence—that God is working through the painful circumstances of my life—I live more at rest than when anxiety takes over, and I think I have to “do something” to fix things. I love coming back to that place of recognizing how powerless I am without him, and though he doesn’t always do things the way I want, he has a plan that will work all things for his good and purpose, which will also be to my ultimate blessing.
He’s got this! It may not look like it. Everything in you might be raging with fear, but he is already on the other side of your pain, inviting you into his rest and joy.
By the way, the Urban Mystic podcast mentioned above is one of the best interviews I’ve ever been part of because of the depth of the questions being asked by my two South African hosts. It allowed me to unpack my journey in a way I’ve never done before, especially how God continued to draw me into the reality of his revelations at crucial points in my journey. If you haven’t heard it yet, you might want to listen to it.