Some thoughts while waiting at Newark Airport this morning:
This week, Sara and I have been in New York City with our oldest granddaughter. As she prepares to graduate eighth grade and start high school, we wanted to spend some time with her in a place she’s always longed to see. The three of us have had the best time exploring the city and taking her to Broadway since she loves drama and is quite good at it. Today we head separate directions—Sara goes home with our granddaughter, and I head to Pittsburgh and West Virginia for the weekend.
Last week, I posted on FB an acknowledgment of all the birthday greetings I received. In that post, I mentioned a bit about Sara as the one who really facilitates all I do in the world. “I wouldn’t be the man I am without that girl. I couldn’t do what Father has asked me to do in the word without that girl. We wouldn’t be on this journey without her courage to follow the Lord’s leading beyond the edges of the maps religion gave us. No one pays a bigger price for what we do than she does. I love it when so many of you acknowledge that in my travels. You realize that Sara pays a huge price in all of this, too. And I think it touches her when I tell her that you’re aware.”
After that posted I received an email from someone across the U.S. They suggested someplace we might visit while in NY because she thought Sara would enjoy it. Then she wrote this:
“I don’t know if she came to mind for any reason. Maybe you all will want to go there or maybe it is just evidence of how your love for Sara is contagious and you have placed her in our hearts, too. Hmmm… Is that what you are doing with Papa?”
That made me smile, on both counts. I love placing Sara in people’s hearts, though I’ve never thought of it in those terms. But I do so intentionally. Sara and I are one, and to know me is to know Sara, at least I hope so. Even when she can’t travel with me, I want people to know her and feel connected to her as well. Watching her journey up close and personal has been one of the most incredible joys of my life, and I enjoy the insights Father has given her along the way.
Wanting to place her on people’s hearts is also a deliberate act. When I first started traveling I had overtures from some women that made me uncomfortable, and some that were overtly inappropriate. But I also noticed that when I talked about Sara, those overtures didn’t happen. Once people knew how devoted I am to the love of my life, no one dared crossed those boundaries.
But I also love the second part of her comment, “Is that what you are doing with Papa?” I hope so. I’ve never thought of that in those terms either, but I hope my life does that. I hope I speak endearingly enough of Father and live authentically enough with him that others begin to catch glimpses of him in their own lives as well. And I don’t mean in that religiously manipulative way that turns people off to any mention of God. I want them to be as endeared to him as I am.
This all reminds me of an exchange I had over fifteen years ago. I’d spent an evening with someone who had been an elder of a large fellowship before he left it and the faith when he became disillusioned by seeing the private lives of the church staff and the guest speakers who had visited. We had a fun dinner together where we laughed and shared stories from our lives. At the end of it, I got an email from him. The subject line was, “Not Impressed.” My heart sank until I read his first paragraph.
He wrote, that for the first time in his life, he came away from dinner with an author/speaker type and was not impressed with him. “At the end of the evening, I came home hungry not to know Wayne better, but wanting to know Wayne’s Father.”
That’s one of my favorite emails ever. If our lives can do that, especially when we’re not trying to make it happen, how awesome would that be?
6 thoughts on “Placed in the Hearts of Others”
“That made me smile, no both counts. I love placing Sara in people’s hearts, though I’ve never thought of it in those terms. But I do so intentionally. Sara and I are one, and to know me is to know Sara, at least I hope so.”
This is what sticks out for me on your post today. Today I am wondering how long that takes. I know we are told at our weddings that we are one flesh, but I wonder if it more about becoming one, then being one.
You shared this blog post on my tenth wedding anniversary date. I am sitting in my office wondering what that means in my own life today after being married for ten years. If someone were to look at me, would they see my husband too? We are so very different. How much of him has become who I am today. I know I have changed, but can they see him in me?
And then when you shared about your dinner and your guest came away with more than just meeting you, he came away with meeting your Father. Now I am wondering again… just how much of Papa do people see in me? We are so very different. And more often than not, I feel like I am on my own ride and I don’t see him with me. Then my husband of ten years reminds me of who he sees when he looks at me. In his own words, I realize he sees the God that I have so long tried to become one with. Maybe I don’t see it, but he does. And I need to trust his judgement… because he is the more observant one of us.
Thank you Wayne for this timely post.
Ruby from Calmar, Alberta, Canada
Hi Ruby. I think it’s less about seeing Sara in me, as hearing me talk about her and feel like they know her because of all the Sara stories I tell. But I’m sure this takes much longer than ten years. At ten years in, I don’t think anyone would have been saying this about me. And back then we were always together, so people weren’t only getting to know her through. my eyes, she was right there too. But I love the idea of placing God in someone’s heart. I’m sure that takes time too. But it is why I love the Galatians 4 verse about Jesus taking shape in us. I love that it’s HIS work, not OURS. I just get to revel in his love, get to know him as much as I can, and get to follow him where he leads as best I know. He does the taking shape.
I remember you talking about your beloved Sara when you were in the UK, many years ago. It made me so happy to know that we were listening to a true man of God! We are now leading a small group in an NFI church. It causes me some pain! (NFI, not the small group!) However, my husband is happy, settled and contributing loads. I love him. I heard a lovely quote from a child who was sitting at the table but must have misbehaved and was told to stand over there! He protested, but finally stood where he was told to. “I am standing here, but I am sitting down on the inside!” I am in an NFI church but I am free on the inside! And right now, there is nowhere else I would rather be. We love the people there.
Thank you Sara and Wayne for your enduring ministry to us – the InsideOuters!
Impressed! But in a good way. Thank you for sharing your heart and your loves.
I have to comment on what this women said, “are you placing Papa in our hearts.”
We met a couple years ago after I read,”He loves Me” My oldest daughter was going through a domestic violence divorce and in the middle of that my husband decides to leave us all after 33 years of marriage.
When I met you, though, it was very brief the love and concern and sweet connection moved me. I said, “Papa that love is what I desire and what I too want to share with others. ” HE has been faithful to that!!!
Thank you for sharing your life and family and Brads life and family with all of us.
Hi Annette. What a sweet note! It’s surprising what happens in brief connections, but I’m so grateful you have found his faithfulness to be sufficient for anything life can throw at us. May you always know his blessing and joy.
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