I found your home page last night... Reading some of your material, it was like I could have written most of it. I am 63 year old and live in a little town of 195 people. I have been saved since 1972 and been involved in both planting a new church and been through a couple of ugly splits. We spent the four years before moving up here downtown Denver. We helped start a new church and spent a lot of time working with the people from the missions and rehabs. We felt called down there but after a lot of time to think and pray about it I'm not sure it wasn't just ego talking. Needless to say, it was like pouring all your spiritual energy down a black hole. My wife is still now over it. I have become involved with a small community church here in town. I have finally got an adult Sunday school started and the Holy Spirit seems to be working on a couple of the people. (Some have told me) to walk away because no one will ever be able to change anything. I don't feel that I can walk away at this point and am looking for some direction.
While I agree that it is extremely rare that anyone really changes things in institutional settings (and I'm pretty certain that God has NOT asked us to change others), that doesn't mean he won't call us from time to time to walk alongside those who don't quite see things the way we do, or even the way God wants them to. I would tell you to make no effort to change them or the setting. Just love them. If change comes, GREAT! If not, God may well call you to move on at some point. I think the most critical thing is for us to simply be obedient every day to what we sense God is asking us to do. He can take care of the details.